The first rays of sunlight peeked through the white curtains, little shafts of gold cutting through the darkness of her room. The golden light dappled her thin form under the soft linens, her blue-green eyes opening to meet the day. Her milky skin actually seemed to have been given some color in that light, giving her a bronze glow that she wished could really belong to her.

Bella rose, stretching, rubbing her eyes, and running a hand through her curly hair. A tub of fresh, warm water sat by the armoir, and she removed her nightgown and slipped into it. The water soothed her nerves, as she'd been plagued by the usual nightmares all night long. But one thing had been different about that night. She'd dreamed. And for once, it had been pleasant. Pleasant, because Fé had been in it, saving her from her nightly demons and torture that opened old wounds and often created new ones. He was taking her away from something in the dream...She remembered now. It was her mother's grave, and she was pinned to it by her father, his ugly, snarling demon form ripping at her flesh.

The scent of apple filled Bella's nostrils as she scrubbed with the inn's complimentary soap. The sun bathed her in it's warmth, adding to the joy of the moment. She sat there for a while, eyes closed, remembering the dream, hoping that maybe she'd fall asleep and go back to it.

She was interrupted by a knock at the door. Tom's cheery voice quietly spoke through the door,"Oy! Bella? I was jus' checkin' up on ya' is all. You were havin' one heck of a fit lass! Millie had to come into yer room to see what was wrong twice, yer poor thing...Nightmares again, eh?"

"Who told you about...Oh, nevermind...Thank you for your concern Tom, but I'll be quite well. And tell your wife many thanks for looking after me," she replied.

The dreams had been particularly bad that night, and she could understand if she'd been talking, or perhaps even screaming in her sleep again. She heard Tom walk away from the door, and stood up from her bath. Putting on a dress that she supposed Millie or one of Tom's daughters had supplied, she pondered on how Fé had slept. The dress was white, with a flowy train and a silver collar. She tied up her hair with a green ribbon, and put on her silk slippers. Finally, she added the final touch- a sash of green.

She stepped out of the room, and stalked down the steps in her silk slippers, walking through the backdoor, into the apple orchard. She took off her slippers, and felt the dew beneath her feet. The sun flooded the courtyard of apples, and she smiled. It was going to be a lovely day.

Fé shot up out of his bed with a clenched fist. "Aaaaagh!" He screamed loudly, quickly closing his mouth, though. He didn't want to wake anyone, even though it looked as though it was early in the morn already and the sun peaked through his window. He breathed very heavily and swung his feet off the bed, onto the floor, seconds later. He rose to his feet without any thought and ran to the bathroom, stumbling into the door frame on the way and slouching into the bathroom, onto the floor. He grabbed the sink as a support, and tried to pull himself up. He couldn't do it, and used his other hand on the bathtop to help himself up. Finally risen, he clenched the sink to hold himself up, which he could barely do. He faced the mirror, but dare not open his eyes. "Please..." He said, to himself.

As he slowly peaked through his slowly opening lids, he was not too shocked to see what he expected to see in the mirror. Not his face, but one of a deformed dead man. "Aaa..." He stated, almost with no emotion whatsoever. He backed up from the slight shock, and fell out of the bathroom onto the bedroom floor. "Father, no, father! Spare me! I tried to... They.. kept coming. Nooo!"

The deformed figure slowly came out of the mirror. It was strange to watch, as the glass of the mirror wrapped around the form like plastic before snapping at a point of pressure and allowing the figure to exit the mirror, standing before Fé, who cowered in fear on the floor.

"Son," the figure stated, "how could you let that happen to us? Your clansmen? All of the Baj surely laugh at the Phaelisu name... All because of you, Isurphéollyn... You -- Are -- A -- FAILURE!"

"NOO!" Fé screamed, "I'm not! I was only ten! You can't keep blaming me! It wasn't my fault! I'm not a failure! I'm not a failure! I'm not a fail--"

Fé shot up in his bed and shouted; "URE!!" He blinked, and glanced around. He was doused in sweat, and his baggy pants stuck to his legs. He feared that if he placed his palm to his chest, the same would happen because of the sweat amounts. "Not... again," he muttered to himself. "I'm not a failure..." he whispered, "Xlander save me."

Bella jumped in the courtyard. She could've sworn she'd heard Fé yelling. Tossing aside the basket of apples she'd been harvesting for breakfast, she ignored her silk slippers and dashed inside barefoot. She darted up the stairs silently and graceful, as silent and graceful as she was on the job.

Fears pounded in her head. Fé didn't have any enemies, did he? No, he couldn't He wasn't even of Imythess, and when she'd found him he'd only just arrived. Guiwen, she thought, racing to his door, What did Guiwen say about interdimmensional demons? If carried by a host they could envelope him as he walks the different planes of exsistence, strengthening in the demon's own world, and weakening in a world that it does not belong to.

Bella recited Guiwen's teaching's in her head, her clammy palms reaching for the doornob. The door swung open, and she dashed to his side. Sitting on the bed, she placed a hand to his forehead, sticky with sweat. His hair was plastered to his face and scalp, and she quickly retrieved a towel from next to the basin on the dresser. Wiping his face clear of sweat, she asked,"Fé, are you all right? My dear, was it a nightmare?"

She would be relieved if he said it was. She knew the dangers of traversing the planes, especially if it was not by your choice. The fact that that had hapenned to him scared her for him. She herself could never figure out how to Walk. She could open portals, but they were small and never lasted more than enough time to let her take a peek into the world on the opposite side.

Bella held the towel in her hand, and looked caringly over Fé. She honestly hadn't been so scared in her life. Not for anyone. Even herself. Fear so strong had never come to her while fighting off guards or vampire slayers; that was her job. It was a strange thing for her to feel such fear for another.

his heart jolted when he heard and saw the door fly open as it did. He feared the worst. He feareed that he was still asleep, and that this was, yet another, horrible dream of his deformed father. But... It wasn't. Fé was very enlightened to see Bella running through the doorway, not anything else. But... Heavens, why Bella?

"What...?" Fé was still a little woozy, but got the jist of what Bella said to him. Half of it was mumbles to his ears, as for he was a little bit tired. "Oh," he just said to tide her over, so to say. That response would have to do until he could work up the courage to even speak, still fearing his fathers unattractive face would pop around any corner, at any second, and call him a failure.

His dreams were becomming more and more realistic. He could never really tell if he was awake, or asleep. "Xlander be with me," he muttered very softly, "Xlander save me." And after that, he tried his best to work his body into a fairly upright position. He pushed on the bed, until his back was against the wall and he could lean on it without using much force to stay up.

"Bella," he said, motioning for her to sit on the bed as well; "Why did..." He sighed softly, "Never mind, I'll think nothing of it." He knew this was a dream now. For, if this was real, why would Bella refer to him as 'my dear.' It would have been a dream come true... If it weren't a dream.

"You have nightmares too, don't you?" Bella sighed, obeying Fé's beckoning and seating herself next to him on the bed," My father is always in them. Sometimes, he makes me think I'll never wake up, he tells me I'll just die in my sleep with nothing but torment to look forward to. But, I do wake up, and I wake up the next day, and the next, and everyday after that. It's only a dream."

Tom stood silently outside the door. So she really was growing up, wasn't she? He'd never seen her so happy. She usually came to him like a beaten pup, forlorn and lost in her troubles. He remembered a young woman who only wore dark green and brooding black, with a tired face, and unlit eyes. This Bella was jubilant, with a sparkle in her aquamarine orbs, and she was wearing white! Not just white, but the dress Millie had worn when he met her. The great, cheery man quietly pattered away, thudding down the steps to see his wife in the kitchen. He greeted her with a hug, and watched as the mayflies zoomed about in the dew sodden apple orchard.

"You can't sit in bed forever," Bella said, grazing Fé's arm with her hand, and smiling. She stood up, and said," I think one of Tom's daughters, Marisol Anne, I presume, left you a tub of water. Wash up and meet me in the kitchen, won't you?"

Belladonna left the room, and stepped down the stairs. She retrieved her slippers from the garden, and picked up the spilled apples and the basket. With a dull thudding noise, the apples fell into one of the barrels in the kitchen. She navigated her way through the kitchen to the dining room, and seated herself at the long, rectangular, mahogany table. It was a relief to know that Fé was alright.

Daughters? He thought to himself for a moment, but really didn't think much of it. He stood, sighing just a bit, then walked over towards the bathroom to see what she was talking about. Sure enough, she was right, there was a bath ready. "Heh..." He laughed softly, "Normal water." He just put his finger into the water, but quickly pulled it out at a burning pain. "Why'd I bother?"

He left the room... Stopped, then turned back to the bath. He clenched his fist ready, and took in a deep breath. As quick as he could, he shot his hand down into the tub, grabbed the plug, and just pulled it up out of the drain while shooting his arm right back out again. Any of his skin that was exposed to the water was a slightly more red colour... Then returned to normal. "Gah," he grunted, "now THAT burns..."

He left the bathroom for good this time, and walked to his bed. There was his bag next to it. "Wait," he thought, "why am I bothering? I'll just wake up soon... Before long, my ugly dad will waltz in -- DAMN HIM!" Fé was still convinced he was dreaming. Fé just sat back down on his bed, and then laid. It would take something pretty extraordinary to convince him it was no longer a dream.

Ama's voice entered Belladonna's head, snickering. The demoness spider, laughing wholeheartedly, telepathically informed her Mistress as she seated herself onto Bella's hand, He still thinks he's asleep, you know.

What?

He thinks he's still dreaming. It's actually kind of funny, he thinks it's impossible for you to refer to him as 'my dear'. Ha! By simply adding in 'my dear' he convinced himself that he had to be dreaming, because that coul-

Just because I said...'My dear'? Perfect...

Unbeknownst to herself, Bella had sighed the last word aloud. Her heart sunk. Did Fé honestly believe that it had to be a dream come true if she refered to him as 'my dear'? She hesitated, contemplating wether or not she should knock some sense into him. Amarwen crawled away from her palm in haste, spotting the mayflies outside and scouting for places to spin a web. Finally, she pulled her thin frame out of the chair, and walked slowly up the stairs.

Bella stepped into the doorway of Fé's room. Keeping calm, though her cheeks were slightly flushed, and she felt just a twinge of frustrated disbelief, she walked up to his bedside. Her dress trailed out behind her, her red curls bouncing as she walked. Standing before him, her arms crossed, she said," You aren't dreaming. Get up. Millie just made breakfast."

Anticipating that he wouldn't be moved by this, she added," And just because I refered to you as 'my dear', it doesn't mean that it isn't real."

Bella's cheeks were flushed, and butterflies fluttered in her chest. She fiddled with one of the curls that'd come loose of her ponytail, and watched him expectantly.

"Huh..?" Fé was shocked to see his dream Bella come back into his room -- Or, at least, he thought she was only a dream. A part of a play. A wicked plot played by his father's altereality being... He did it too often. In dreams mostly, which was why Fé had taken up the art of controlling his dreams.

It was simple, really. He always made sure to carry something written, or "in stone" with him -- Such as the time, or a book. If he looked at it, waited a while, then looked at it again, and it was totally different then what it should have been... He knew he was in a dream. Also, it could be triggered by something he knew couldn't be real -- Like Bella refering to him in such a sweet way. When this happened, Fé was understanding that he was in a dream, and he was free to do as he pleased in his dream until he awoke. Altering the dream environment entirely was much harder... For the most part, Fé could only recognize he was in a dream, and act in it as if he were awake... However, future events were still unknown to him, which was why his father was often able to scare him still. This art, however, led to the increasingly difficult task of telling real... from dream.

So, my father has started the real fun now, hmm? Even trying to make the characters in my dream make me think its not a dream. Fé smirked... To a bystander, it would look almost evil actually. "You're pathetic," he simply stated, so it would seem he refered to Bella. "I'm not falling for--..." He stopped. He had an idea.

If he was going to dream, and awake at any unbeknownst moment... Why not have a little fun with what he had? "I'm sorry, Bella... I'll get up," Fé sprung his feet off the bed and onto the floor, standing. He smiled at her rosy cheeks and brushed his right hand against her right cheek. His left hand swooped down and curled around her slender waist, embracing it to his body.

"Bella," he said, "you are simply amazing. An angel," he laughed, "truly sent by Xlander himself." Even though he knew, or thought, he was in a dream... He still spoke sincerely, and meant every word. "Your eyes, my lord... Well, I'd go on, but I fear my words wouldn'y nearly do your beauty the justice it deserves." He smirked a little bit again, and continued. "You know, Bella, my dear," he purposely added, "I've always said that actions speak louder that words."

With that, his right hand slipped towards her neck and wrapped around it, as his left still embraced her waist. He pulled her towards him as his lips met hers.

Bella frowned as he spoke. Was he being sincere, or trying to take advantage of the fact that this was a supposed 'dream'? Not that she disliked being told she was beautiful, it was actually rather nice. And the angel part? She melted, but kept a straight face on the outside. As he wrapped his hand around her waist and brought her nearer, she said,"Fé this is-"

But, was soon cut off by his unprompted kiss. She wanted to kiss him back. She reallly really wanted to , but that would be taking advantage of him. There was that and the fact that she was so angry with him she thought she might hit him if given the chance.

Bella pulled herself out of his arms, ending the kiss. Angrily, she said,"Isurphéollyn Phaelisu, you are beyond infuriating. This is not a bloody dream! Why can't you see that? My feelings for you don't exsist in a blooming dream! I do love you!"

Before she knew it, her arm was extended, and her palm flat. Quickly, she slapped him, and fuming she left the room for the second time. Face red, she ran past a befuddled Tom, who yelled," Belladonna! What's wrong lass?"

But, before he could try to follow her, Millie had caught him by the arm, and brought him back to the kitchen, shaking her head. Bella burst through the backdoor, running through the courtyard in her slippers, which were now ruined by the dew, and found the giant oak tree in the back left corner. Deftly, she climbed it, swinging herself into one of th large branches. She sat there, her arms crossed, back turned to the inn, and her face flushed. A couple tears rolled down her cheeks.

Fé laughed softly and held his face in a bit of pain from her slap, then sat back at the bed's head. "Ah... If only that were real," Fé slightly swooned, "even her slaps are gentle on my skin... Such soft elegence, such perfection. She must have been a priestess," he spoke to himself. He rubbed his arm slightly, "Ugh... Still burns from that water," he noted.

"Hmm... I must say, this one's rather realistic... The pain is so... So... That kiss was... So... Her slap... So REAL!" A sudden shock of truth struck him as he'd thought he'd have a heart attack. "I just... Really kissed her... And... Well, I wanted to.. Right? No, of course I did... But.." He was so socked. "I think... I'm going to be sick," He clenched his stomach.

He found it funny how, when he thought it was a dream, he felt no shame or embarrassment in doing what he truly wanted to do; in kissing Bella. However, even after it was all over, he now felt a bit of regret -- Only because he did it when he thought it was a dream, not when he was 'awake'.

"How will I ever face her again? How... Am I supposed to do that? I can't, oh Xlander--" He darted off the bed and into his adjacent bathroom, dropping to his knees at the toilet. He flung the seat up and stuck his head in its direction, letting his last meal come back up. He was that nervous and distraught.

"Oh Xlander," he said, flushing the toilet and sitting back against the wall, still on the floor, "how will I explain this to her? But I wanted to do it... She obviously didn't, though, she slapped me.. I'll -- I'll just apologize." He sighed, "What have I gotten myself into?"

What'd she say about love? He could barely remember...

Bella sat in the courtyard for another couple of minutes. She was feeling awfully now, and she couldn't believe that she'd slapped Fé. Part of her wanted to reassure her that he deserved it, but the other part felt terrible. The part that felt terrible was enveloping the other. Bowed her head in guilt, hiding her face in her hands. Quickly, she twisted around to take a peak at his window. She could see it from her vantage point in the tree, but he wasn't viewable from her angle.

The guilt swelled in Bella's chest, and her cheeks flushed bright red. A tiny weight landed on her shoulder, and she turned her head to see Amarwen sitting there. The purple spider looked at Bella with her eight eyes thoughtfully. Woefully, Bella telepathically asked her familiar,What? What're you thinking?

That you've changed. Quite a lot, actually. You're becoming more like your mother everyday. As much as it pains me to say it, you should apologize.

My sentiments, exactly, Bella replied, dropping to ground. She straightened out her dress, and let Ama crawl down to her hand. The spider jumped from Bella's hand to the ground as deftly as Bella could climb a tree.

She tip-toed up the staircase, her white dress trailing out behind her. She stood in the doorway of Fé's room, noting that he was not by his bed. Taking a deep breathe, she ventured into his room, hands clasped behind her back. The bathroom door was open, and she entered it. He was sitting against the wall, looking terribly pale. Seeing his face made her feel even worse. She sat next to him, feeling the cold wall against her back, and said," I'm sorry. I shouldn't have slapped you. That was terrible of me."

He jumped at her voice, as she had snuck up on him. He blinked and kind of scooted away from her... Then felt horrible about it, and scooted back next to her... But dared not look in her eyes. He looked down, at his knees, and put his fists on his forehead while his elbows pried against his knees.

"I..." He sighed softly, "Don't apologize, Bella, don't you dare." He sniffled his nose a little bit -- It would have appeared like he was crying, but with his eyes out of sight only Fé himself could be sure. "I don't want you to hear you say you're sorry... I don't want to hear that. You have no reason to be sorry... I..."

He sniffled once more, and put his hands over his eyes. He sniffled for a third time and sighed. "I violated you, Bella..." He turned his back to her, "I deserved that slap... No, more than that. May Xlander... STRIKE ME DOWN!" He took in a deep breath, "No, worse... May my father..." He stopped. He knew what he was going to say, but dared not say it aloud... Lest it might actually happen.

"Why'd... you come back in here? To hit me again?"

"Hit you again?" Bella said, laughing incredulously," Why ever would I do that when I'd just apologized for doing it."

She watched him, her blue-green eyes analyzing his every move. Fé made it seem as if he were crying, though she knew he wasn't trying to fake anything, and for all she knew, he was crying. He was being totally sincere. Her gaze softened as he turned his back to her, and one of her slender hands found itself upon his hair. She stroked his brown hair gently, and quietly said," Why ever would you think kissing me a violation? Unprompted, yes, but a violation? Hardly. I most certainly did not dislike it."

Bella wrapped an arm around one of his, pulling Fé to his feet. She felt horrible to see him in such a state, and found herself on the verge of tears. He was innocent and pure, just like everything she wished she was. Everything Ama, Tom, and Millie saw her transform into. She wanted nothing more than to be with him at that very moment and live in total disregard of her lineage for the rest of her life. Her father, her family, would not trouble her as long as he was there. The dream she'd had foretold it.

She grazed his face with her milk white hand, and before she knew it, she had wrapped her arms around his neck in an embrace. Quietly, she said," Never say sorry for loving me. I'll do the same for you."

the eighth age... Xlander was just becomming a popular deity among the people of Valdar, even to some of the frigid Eligrathians, which he was of course. Worshipping a god other than Sa'Tan, however, was blasphemy to one of the Baj Lands... And Fé was bound to his land. When Xlander's head Acolyte, Elro Taite, was passing through the Baj on a pilgramage, Fé and a few of his allies raided Elro's encampment to get supplies and... fresh meat.

There was a girl with Elro, bound to the temple's teachings as Elro was. Her name was Amethyst, as Fé remembers, and she had purple eyes. He would never forget her, he thought, and that she was the most beautiful girl in the world. He thought that she was surely a sign sent from Xlander that any who would dare harm Elro's entourage would pay. This was only the first miracle from Xlander that would cause Fé to convert.

Fé snapped back to reality... And sighed. "Your eyes," he simply noted, "They're more beautiful than..." He dared not speak her name once more, fearing affections that had long passed. He didn't want them back. She drove him mad in his dreams -- Or, had, before he came to this new place. Instead... Now his father haunted his dreams.

He embraced her as well, both arms wrapping around her slender waist in a sweet embrace. "Bella..." He tookhis eyes away from her angelic face, "I do not deserve to look upon your perfection. You... Are too good for me," he said, "I have violated you in a sense that I did something I should not have. I am... shocked, needless to say, that you imply you enjoyed the hellish thing... But I must still apologize, for it was not just of me to have done. Can you forgive me? After all... I'll take my leave later this morn; I'll not bother you any more."

"Oh please, Fé, no!,"Bella cried, her face becoming pale," Please, don't leave. I would hate for you to leave. And don't you ever say that I am too good for you! You are too good for me, if anyone is too good for anyone. Don't you dare say sorry, you are too much of a gentleman! There is nothing to forgive! Don't..Please..."

Bella caressed his face with her hand, her eyes filled with concern. This is what she'd feared. To be alone. She couldn't handle that, not now that her mother was dead. Not now that her heart had finally become warm again, instead of icy like it was. And white. What a whimsical thought...She wore white. Mother wore white, she thought.

Looking him straight in the eyes, she firmly said,"Isurphéollyn Phaelisu, I have done things I regret. In my veins there is blood impure, but never have I felt so right around someone. Never have I been an angel. Do not protest that statement; it is the truth. But, never has anyone made me feel so pure. Please, don't leave me."

Bella's lower lip trembled. Resisting tears was useless now, and she let her eyes drop to the floor, warm, salty tears dripping down her cheeks. Nervously, she laughed, a hollow quiet laugh. She brushed a curl out of her face, and looked back up at Fé. Quietly, she said, smiling a weak smile,"Breakfast is probably ice cold."

Fé shook with utter regret. Why was his life so clicheély like a fairy-tale? Why did everything in his life have to be related around misery, regret, lost loves, silly sorrows, and an undenyable fate that can only be realized when times are at their worst? He found is ironically funny that, raised as an Eligrathian, silly tales of woe and heroes meant nothing to the children, to the youth -- Only training and war did. But not more that five hundred miles away, in the Valdarian capital, tales of Xlander's bravery and heroism were told to the little ones as encouragement -- And oh! How they listened on the edge of their seats!

"Bella..." He knew what he wanted to say. What could be more simple? Just open your mouth, and let the words flow from you as normal, right? Alas, for a monk of Xlander's House, it was not as easy. At least, it wasn't as easy if you wanted to say what Fé wanted so eagerly to say himself. "There's something... That I want to say, but I just can't, you know?" Shaking his head, he let one of his trademark sighs slowly pass from his lips. "It's simply forbidden. I can not go against my God, you understand? And... Already, by violating you," he still called it, "I have sinned a great weight onto my shoulders that I must soon relieve by praying for forgiveness."

Fé looked right into Bella's eyes, "You must have religions in this land that are the same way... You must understand. I want, so badly, to love you, Bella..."

Fé moved towards her again, like he had before in the room, and let his lips meet with hers. His nose brushed against her cheek as his upper lip locked between both of hers, his hands wrapping around her waist and pulling her close to him, her breasts pressing against his chest. Before he knew it, though, the euphoric kiss came to a halting end, as all great things do, as he slowly stepped back from her, with a tear streaming down his cheek -- A tear that did not occupy that space before he had kissed her.

"But I just can not..."

"Fé," Bella whispered, pleading as tears dripped from her cheeks. That kiss...That splendid kiss...Did it have to end? There was nothing more she wanted then to be in his arms again, to hold him closer than anyone she'd ever known. But, he couldn't. He shed a solitary tear. She swore she could've seen herself reflected in it. Taking a small step towards him, she pleaded," Please, don't do this to me, please. Fé, I know...Here we don't...Our gods and goddesses, they don't condemn love. Not in any of our religions. Fé...I love you."

Cautiously, unsure of whether he'd withdraw from her touch now, she brushed away the warm tear that's fallen down his face. Her hands fell to her side, limp like the rest of her body seemed to be, like she was melting under the weight of something instead of being crushed instantly. Her eyes fell to the floor, their lids feeling like shutters made of lead. She shuddered, a quiet sob leaving her lips. She did not want to make him do anything he did not want to do. Even if that meant she would put her own sanity in jepordy. Trembling, she said," I would not have you do anything you did not want to do. I love you Isurphéollyn Phaelisu. So stop calling that kiss earlier a violation. It wasn't."

She left the bathroom, her eyes still glued to the floor; she couldn't look at him for fear what sorrow it would unleash. Walk out the door, Bella, she told herself, Please, just leave. But, she couldn't leave his room. Her knees gave way, and she let herself quietly topple to the ground, bringing her knees up to her chest, hiding her face in her hands. She sobbed, her breaths heavy, her face moistenened by the relentless stream of tears. She rose up suddennly and ran to her room, slamming the door closed. She sat on her bed, weeping. His kiss was still burning on her lips; his face wouldn't leave her memory. Please Fé, she begged in her head, Why?

Fé clenched his fist in anger, rage, and in spite of inner disputes. He looked down, his eyes closed so shut that his skin around them wrinkled. He shut them to keep in the tears, as he wouldn't let another escape. Secretly, under his breath and in his heart, he was cursing the very God he so unsparingly worshipped with utter benevolence and devout. In a native tongue, he cursed; Mer wit nonnen Xlander! he shouted as loud as he could, not afraid of Bella hearing as he knew she wouldn't really understand what he was saying. In a loose translation though, it would be considered a very vulgar insult towards one named 'Xlander,' which was of course his God.

He stood in the doorway between the bathroom and the main room, looking at Bella on the floor. Her back was to him, but he knew she was listening. "What would you have me do, Belladonna? Would you have me through away everything I've vowed my life for? Would you have me cast aside my ways of chivalry? Because, my dear, I assure you I am not as much of a gentleman when I don't have the eyes of my Lord watching over me!" He growled softly under his breath, unable to inform the beloved Bella of his past occupation, of his countless and senseless murders of innocent pilgrims, mere years before becomming one himself.

Fé stopped himself. He realized just now that his voice had raised in tone, making it sound angry, although he wasn't (or, at least, not as mad at his voice made him sound). He sighed and looked to the side, stoping his asinine words from escaping his mouth.

"Bella," he said in a calmer tone, "You haven't a clue how dearly I care for you... I haven't known you long, and yet I feel as though I have. I can't explain it... I love you, too, Bella, but.." Fé just closed his eyes, "I can't."

Bella stood up, facing him. Her normally pale face was red and tearstained, her eyes bloodshot from crying. Her insides were writhing with a variety of emotion, pain and sadness being the foremost, with a light tinge of anger and hurt, because he'd raised his voice. She wiped her face clean with the back of her hand, and took a breath. Laughing a little, she said," You don't get it, do you?"-she turned her back to him, walking towards a window, her arms crossed over her chest-"You are the only person I've spoken to like this in a hundred years. You are the only person I've ever felt love for, beside my mother who died not but a week ago. That's why I was in the cemetary. I was visiting her! They were happy she died! I have nothing left but you!"

Anger was rising in her at the thought of her mother's death and her father's hatred. The sheild she had been hiding beneath was dead, now, and the one person she'd finally found love in was probably going to leave her. She turned on the back of her heel, facing him, her watery eyes glistening as she yelled," I'm the daughter of a demon, Isurphéollyn! I've never known love like this! I want to be with you! Please! Your God does not define wether or not you are chivalrous! That's a choice you make! Not Him! What, are you going to simply throw this all away? I...don't...I can't..."

Words were failing her. She almost wanted to let herself fall out of the open window and transform into a bat. She could just disappear, resume a cold life as a heartless theif. Loosen up and fall, she thought, You've done this a million times. Her aquamarine eyes fell to the floor. She looked back up at him. Just the thought of him was keeping her there.

"I'm sorry for yelling," she sighed, closing her eyes, as she shook her head," I'm sorry for everything. I can't leave you, but I can't make you stay. Please Fé, if you're going to leave...I...Oh, please don't go...If you do..." Her voice trailed off as she stammered. Bella knew what the consequences would be if he left. She knew what would happen, even though she wanted to deny it. She could remember turning the key and locking the door, remembered the hunger that tore at her stomach, the evil she felt surge through her while she screamed. The demon would return. It was just waiting. And this time, it wouldn't let her go. It'd keep her. She didn't have her mother anymore, and if he left she'd be left with nothing at all. Not even Tom or Millie could help.

Fé turned away now, back into the bathroom, but didn't bother to close the door behind him. He didn't care if she heard him, or saw him, as there was nothing she could say or do to change his mind -- Or so, he thought. He slammed his fists down on the edges of the porcelain sink, and extended his red fingers to grab the corners of the outing. He stared into the mirror that hung above the sink he now grasped with an unknowing strength, his palms pressing into the corners of the sink casing until finally the skin broke. Fé cared nothing for the feeling of pain, and he glared into his iced eyes in the reflection of the mirror. His hair slightly hung over his eyes, somewhat impairing his vision.

"Is this what I've become? After all of my training, Xlander, you've left me here in this place to rot?" The loose linens he wore as pants were beginning to change colour, slowly they faded into a dark red. Fé gasped, and glanced down at them, a blood vessel in his neck stressing as his fists tried to clench but were still opposed by the sink's porcelain outting. Blood fell from his palms to the floor drop by drop and Fé shook his head eagerly, "Xlander... NONNEN XLANDER!" Fé was sure all of this was a sign from his God of what was to come if he continued to be disobedient, but would soon be shown otherwise.

As Isurphéollyn's eyes shot back towards the mirror, his face turned to one of fear. "No, father!" And alas, it was the disturbing picture of his father once more that he saw in the mirror in front of him. "Is this... What I am now?" Fé's heart began to race, his eyes fluttered a thousand times a second, hoping that one time when they opened, everything would be normal again. His reality failed to return, and Fé's hands returned from the sink's corners to his sides. They slammed against the mirror in a rage; the left hand with a palm and the right with a fist. Again, then again, and a forth time until the mirror shattered into the sink below it, shards sinking into the drain and some onto the floor.

In pain, Fé pushed away from the mirror and flew back onto the floor behind him. Even though the mirror was gone, he could still see his father's face exactly where it was before. On his way down, Fé grabbed the door's edge and pulld it shut with him. He fell onto the floor, and rolled backwards, out of the bathroom just before the door could shut. All of this happeneing so quickly, it seemed as if it were a dream. But as he saw that his palms were truly bleeding, he knew it was for real as tears began to stream down his cheeks. "Where are you now, Xlander? Where are you now? Save me! What have I done? Why have you left me?"

All of this, right before Bella's eyes, caused Fé to feel extreme embarassment. He had no idea what he'd explain to her, his mind's thoughts in a twisted rage and confused fit. He hadn't even known what he'd tell himself. He wasn't okay, he never would be, and he was just abandonned by the one God he found total confidence in. His life had turned to ashes, as did his sanity, and he was going to throw away the one thing he had left in this new world; Bella.

"I can't do this Bella," he moaned in a faint tone, "ick pro ligen, anno? End my life, won't you?"

Bella jumped, frozen in fear as Fé quickly turned violent. She hid her face in her hands, turning around to look out the window, as though to find someway to escape the agonizing ordeal. She turned again, crouching on the floor, her arms sheilding her head covered in red ringlettes. This is my fault, she thought, What have I done? Quickly she jumped to her feet as Fé tumbled out of the bathroom, the door slamming behind him, pleading for her to kill him.

"No," Bella whispered, shaking her head as they both wept. Did everything in her life have to come to this? Blood and tears and self-doubt? It seemed a never ending motif, her long life a circle of themes, repeated again and again. Swiftly, she crouched down beside him, gently taking his bleeding palms, the warm liquid seeping onto her hands. The sticky red liquid stained her pale hands, dripping onto her white gown, but she didn't care about that; he was the only thing she was concerned with. Shuddering as she spoke, she brushed away his messy locks, and gently said," No, Fé. Don't ask me to do such a thing, please." Quickly, she stood up, opened the door to the bathroom, and retrieved some old cloths, wiping her hands clean. She took his own hands, kneeling before him as she gently wrapped the raw, wounded palms. Finished, she let his hands go, falling back to sit with her knees tucked into her chest, her blood-stained garment flowing out onto the floor. The red stood in violent contrast of the white, smearing the ivory gown with flashes of crimson. But, it was merely a gown. Nothing more.

"I'm so sorry," she said, shaking, as she whispered between sobs,"I'm so sorry, Fé." Quaking, she crawled over next to him, setting herself with her back against the cold wall that made her hairs stand on end. She was almost afraid to touch him, afraid to come to close for fear that he would become angry again. Her heart was throbbing wildly, her breathing irregular and quickened. In a somewhat shell-shocked state, she held her hands folded in her lap. His anger was frightening; it scared her to the very core. Her heart was pulsing as though she'd just seen her father enter the room. Her breaths were ragged, salty tears seeping between her lips as they fell from her red eyes. She took a breath, and dared to rest her head on his shoulder. It was like the night before at the docks. She just sat there, her head on his shoulder. She was desperatly wishing it actually was the night before at the docks. Guilt was washing over her. Her voice quiet and wavering, she said," I'm so sorry. This is my fault...Oh, Fé..."

Bella made a daring move, wrapping her arms around him, her head buried in his shoulder. She could feel his heart beating, the veins pulsing beneath his skin. Quietly, she hummed, holding him there protectively between sobs. Words soon began to leave her lips, a beautiful lilting melody interrupted now and again by sighing sobs. Faintly, her calming voice let the song escape, as she closed her eyes and imagined the two of them somewhere far away,
"Cold is the night
Thou shall have not fear
Warm is the fire
Forever you are held dear

Old are the hills and the rock and stone
Never shall you fade away
You will not pass to ash and bone
Never shall you fade away
You will not pass to ash and bone..."

(( I hope you don't mind, I added to the song. ^_^;; ))

Fé looked down at his hands, his eyes bare of expression as she wrapped them so eagerly to stop the bleeding. His eyes were cold, desolate, and free from any expression whatsoever. They just looked off, into nowhere, not even taking the split seconds needed for blinking as a break. They became dry, and arid, and eventually the tears stopped themselves, his body afraid of making his eyes too dry. Silently, in his head, he pleaded his tears to continue, in hope of some farfetched scheme of dehydration by too much crying, if such a thinkg could even be plausible.

Irritated from the air, his eyes grew bloodshot, but still he did not blink. By this time, Bella had sat down next to him, comforting him by telling him that she was to blame in this awful ordeal. He listened, didn't respond, but also didn't agree. His thoughts raged through his head, half of his brain telling him to scream out in rage once more, and the other half of his brain telling him to kiss her. How could one be expected to live under such conditions? How could one be expected to go on?

His eyes suddenly closed themselves as Bella wrapped her arms around him and began to sing. He didn't know what it was, but he felt as if he knew that song by heart, even though he'd never heard it before. It was a strange sensation, his brain recalling the tune and the words but also thinking that they weren't in his memory anywhere. He quietly hummed along with her until she was done with her part. He opened his mouth when she was done, and continued the song from his half-recollecting memory:

"The day is sure to come,
Look towards the sunrise,
It always brings the joy of hope
Into those lustful eyes."

Fé sighed, gently propping his shoulder up to move her head only into a position that he could turn and see eye-to-eye with her. "Is that how the song goes? Perhaps I am thinking of a different one... But I swear I know that song." Fé didn't think too much of it at the moment, and returned his eyes floor-bound.

"How am I supposed to live, Bella? My God has left me, I'm haunted by my father, and I've done the cruelest of things to you. I can not be a burden... Even if I could stay with you, I would feel imposing."

((Song collaboration! Yay! :P ))

Bella opened her eyes, half in disbelief as Fé finished the song. Her mother had written that song; she distinctly remembered it being sung to her as she lay in her mother's arms, being rocked to sleep in the dead of night. How could he possibly have known of it? And the part her had sung...It was her favorite part. She would rise each morning, the song fresh in her mind, those last verses played out as the sun arose. As far as she knew, interdimensional parellels did not run that far. But there were two things that did; true love and fate. Quietly, she replied to his question, nodding as he positioned himself to look at her," Yes...Yes, that is how it goes." She listened to him speak, the uncertainty he felt ringing clear in his voice. His eyes were glued to the floor, nolonger shedding tears, though still heart-wrenchingingly sad. Her own, the color of sea water, were dry as well, but they held comfort instead of sadness, brimming with love, even after all of the events that'd passed.

"I don't believe that your God left you, Fé. I think he meant for you to be here, because this is your fate, not your punishment. Why else would you have suddennly appeared here were it not for a cause?" Bella said calmly, though her breathing was just assuming regularity once more. Fate always had a reason. Was it's reason for the two of them to save eachother? It seemed a plausible one, for they both seemed to struggle with inner demons. Softly, she continued," Love is never a burden." A slender hand lifted his chin up so that their eyes met, as though to accent her statement. She looked deep into his eyes, her face growing closer to his as her arms wrapped around his neck. She felt his breath warm against her lips as she met his in a kiss, warmth spreading through her body. The world seemed a little brighter even as it ended, the blood on her dress nolonger blood but crimson flowers. Sunlight flooded the room, golden as it passed through the lacy curtains that ruffled in the light breeze.

"We're going to save eachother, Fé," she said, her voice soft and sure, for she knew this, it was fact. She remembered her mother's voice, soft in the night, the calming melody reverberating in her ears as she quietly repeated what had been sung,
"The day is sure to come,
Look towards the sunrise,
It always brings the joy of hope
Into those lustful eyes."
Taking a short breath and emitting a low sigh, she whispered," We're going to save eachother."

"I don't think I can get back on my feet." His eyes were wide and terrified as he glanced around the floor beneath him, in a frantic rage trying so hard to find something that he knew didn't exist. In reality, he didn't even know what he was looking for, perhaps just an excuse or something of the sort. But he didn't really know. Suddenly his whimsical thought train was derailed angrily as she turned his head upwards, his eyes forcefully removed from the floor to which he sought his solitude. He heard her words, so true, and tried so hard to believe what she was telling him. He was still slightly shocked about the whole song thing, of him knowing the other verse to the song he'd never heard before yet knew as if he just heard is sung by his own mother.

A kiss! Ah, what was this that she laid upon his cursed yet beloved lips? The crimson bodies met in mid-air, sharing a passionate moment of simple fate. Alas, twasn't they're first and yet it felt like the best of them, for it sent a shocking rage of freedom through the young man's body. He felt his body enlighten with the best feeling he had ever felt. And yet still, his mind secretly told him he did not deserve this bitter euphoria that was being handed to him on a shiney silver platter. "No!" He shouted in his head, his mind telling him so eagerly to back away from the situation -- "Leave it be," his mind pleaded. His body resisted his mind's urgent call to retreat, and stayed where it was. A fighting war or turmoil took place in his head.

And yet it lasted not long, but short, a simple second of bliss. He heard her whispering a simple nothing; something about saving each other. His mind was elsewhere, and her words were for naught as they passed through one of his ears and out the other. Still though, her attempts were far from in vain. As he now sit there next to her, he felt as if he was such a different person. He felt, for the first time in a very long time, as though he was away from his father's demonic aura. He was slowly beginning to believe what she was saying about Xlander not leaving him, but rather placing him there on purpose.

His brain once again told him to do the right thing, or what he thought was the right thing, and to just tell ger it could never be. But his body did not want to do this. He couldn't live without her now, her taste still on his lips. It wasn't lust though, he could simply tell. He had felt lust before, and it did not burn inside his very being. This was simply something more. He couldn't any longer accept that everything in the world was blank and wgite. He knew now that not everything was about his God or someone else's. What was religion to him in a different realm, anyway?

"Bella..." He whispered softly, his words obviously escaping his lips but not in a single file, "you are... extraordinary." He looked over at her, brushed one of her cheeks softly with the back of his hand, and then moved in closer as if he was going to kiss her again. He didn't, though, and stopped mere inches from her face. He could now feel her breath on his lips. He finally knew what she was feeling this whole time, when he said he was going to leave her after just meeting her. He didn't like the feeling... He could understand why she wouldn't like it either.

He continued moving in as he did before and let his lips meet with hers, harder this time, almost with a force. His right hand slipped behind her left ear, pressing upwards until it reached the back of her head, where it stopped and held her tight. His left, however, moved southwards, around the right side of her waist as if did before with the kiss he bestowed unto her in the bathroom. He held her close, his lips almost mashing with hers like an agressive style of painting, the artist throwing paint onto the canvas with a force.

This time, he did not plan on retreating his lips to quickly.

(I hope you liked it.)